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October 2, 2017

Firmly Planted In Reality

Okay, somewhat planted, but for me, that's a big step

I'm going to go ahead and assume that if you're here, we're friends. So, as one of my internet girlfriends, there's a chance you already know this about me: I'm a bit of a dreamer. My brain is always leaps and bounds ahead of where I am in present moment real life. But not anymore friends, not anymore. Wendy has grown up.
And to be honest, despite Peter Pan's narrative of growing up being something to run from, I'm really digging it, y'all (minus bills—I still hate bills). This weekend I did laundry, got groceries, cleaned, cooked, and continued the never ending task of decorating my apartment. Très normal. Quelle boring. And while I scrolled through Instagram and saw everyone living their best weekend lives, I did not for one second feel like I was missing out.

The greatest part about that is that I bypassed the anxiety that would usually come with wishing I was doing more. I was completely at peace with my reality—you know, my actual life. I'm so used to having goals and wondering, 'what's next' for myself. Imagining all the things I could be doing and how things could and should play out.

I'll never completely get my head out of the clouds, I don't think, but for right now I'm very okay with my reality. It's not perfect, trust me, I could write a whole bulleted list explaining the ways my life could be better. Instead of doing that (which would do nothing but give me a mental breakdown, tbh) I'm choosing to be grateful for what I have, and what I've accomplished so far. It's a much needed break from my dreamer/worrier state and the peace of mind is just c'est bon. 

photos by Brian Cheung


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